October 6, 2011

Mannerisms, for good or evil

I’m in Boreal cafĂ© catching up on blogs. It’s 8am and outside a well-groomed gentleman is sitting on the patio, legs crossed, arms extended, sucking on a cigarette. He’s chatting to a young woman who also looks as though she’s spent considerable time in the mirror. She leans towards him, hangs off his every word and I’m sitting at the window watching and wondering, does she know he’s gay? Does he?

I’m not going to claim to have gaydar but I will say there are red flags for many personality traits, be it shy, impatient, meticulous etc.(a good writer must know these). When I like someone I clam up and morph into the most boring person in the room. You’ll know I’m in love when I’m sitting behind a plant and silently stalking you with my eyes. It’s a wonder how I ever got married.

But there have also been moments where I know someone’s gay before they seem to. I say ‘seem to’ because he already has a girlfriend, he’s already had the opportunity to answer questions about his sexuality, so often so you feel like a total dick for classifying him in the first place. That is until five years later when you bump into him and his same sex partner at the flower show.

And I guess I’m wondering if this woman suspects what I do. She’s a little too attentive.  I found myself, once, in the awkward position of telling a close friend that the guy she was seeing, not only had a girlfriend already but a boyfriend too. The heart wants what the heart wants and unfortunately it makes us all blind. Life would be so much simpler if you could just tell who’s crushing on who. Then again that might be a very bad idea.

On a side note, Steve Jobs has passed away. My iPod, Macbook, Nano, iPad and I

Salute you. 


  1. Hah, one of my favourite pastimes, people watching, body language involuntarily telling me so much in a nanosecond, and one of the reasons I never used to dance myself - even though I got the beat in me. There would be those (from North America) that say, that a lot of European men might come across as gay - but a writer's instinct is usually right, as you say, sometimes knowing things about a person before they do themselves. And yes, Mr Jobs, good job indeed in literally contributing to the world.

  2. @ SP....my instincts aren't always on the money but if everyone else in the room is wondering the same thing.....